Sanctuary

Washing, scrubbing and polishing - good for the soul?

"...there are gods of the house, and our daily work is a way of acknowledging these home spirits that are so important in sustaining our lives.  To them, a scrub brush is a sacramental object, and when we use this implement with care we are giving something to the soul..."

Thomas Moore, Care of the Soul

Sometimes we're so busy physically and mentally that we miss the beauty in our life.

I find that most women see housecleaning as a chore, just something to do and get done.  But of course, housework never stays done.

SInce it is one of those things that has to be done, regardless, and unless you have a live-in housekeeper to do it all for you, chances are it is always on your list.

In fact, it's such a fact of life that it probably isn't even on your list - it's just THERE.

Confession time. There is a basket of ironing next to the dining table, a few piles of folded clothes ON the table, and two baskets of clean, unsorted wash sitting on the floor waiting to be folded. I have an excuse of course. The laundry is being remodelled... it was completely gutted Monday, yesterday the water was off for 4 hours while the plumbing was done and the new cupboards are going in as I type.

Great excuse huh? Only, it's no different any other week of the year. Sometimes I am completely caught up. Sometimes I'm waaaay behind.

And this is the flow of life. Nothing is static. Nothing stays 'done'.

In the music space this month, the CD is Housework Songs. And I say - brilliant! Anything that motivates us to get in there and get the work done is great - just wish I had thought of it.

But I guess I'm talking about going deeper than a funky beat and great songs to get us up and moving, because even that won't work unless we actually get up and put the music on in the first place.

Flylady talks about housework as a blessing to our family. And that can certainly change our perspective on a clean house, but maybe not our enjoyment of the actual task.

As we're talking about reconnecting our head with our heart this month in the space, I'd like to invite you to think about housework and other 'boring' chores as your chance to tune out or turn off the head. Mindless activity usually has our brains start up with a litany of stuff.  Fretting, worrying, cataloguing, dissecting... you know, the stuff your mind does when you're not paying attention.

What I'd like to propose is that we use housework as a form of moving meditation. Our chance to tune out the distractions of the day and turn off our thoughts for a while.  How?

The trick is rather zen like. Basically, you concentrate on what you are doing with 100% attention. We bless the spirits of the house, use the scrubbing brush as a sacremental object .. to give something to the soul.

Can you feel how powerful this could be? Bless the spirits of the house. Bless your family. Treat your housekeeping with care and attention. Make it a meditation on beauty and cleanliness.

Care.

Heart.

(that's the theory... what have you got to loose? You have to do it anyway!)

More on the Value of Renewal and Quiet Space

My last post promised much in the heading.  But upon reflection, I felt I didn't live up to that promise.

So here I would like to talk about the value, and the benefits of scheduling that quiet, alone time - just for you.

It's a bit like self-care for the mind and soul.

The dimension that counts for the creative person is the space he creates within himself. This inner space is closer to the infinite than the other, and it is the privilege of the balanced mind... and the search for an equilibrium is essential - to be as aware of inner space as he is of outer space.

-Mark Tobey

We all know the value of physical rest and renewal.  Without sleep, we'd all pretty soon fall to pieces.  The value of exercise and good nutrition and rest is pushed at us constantly.

But what about the value of mental renewal? 

Mental renewal cannot happen in the midst of our busy lifestyles without conscious planning.  If we live with others (especially children), if we work in a busy environment, if we have an active social and non-work life - the renewal wont just happen.

I, for one, know I need to plan for renewal of my body, my mind and my soul.

Some of this can be accomplished daily by taking a walk (this renews all three, normally).  But this isn't enough for long term growth and renewal.  For without renewal there is no growth.

My life, my work, my business, my children, my marriage, my home, my family and friends, and all the other things I love to do - whilst nourishing to me in so many respects, all also take a toll on my energy that needs to be replenished.

As I said recently, I have begun having weekly therapeutic massages. I am loving the physical boost, but even more importantly, I am loving the relaxation and stress relief and also the knowledge that I am doing something just. for. me.  Something self-ish.

Of course, with such a busy lifestyle there also needs to be some regular down-time.  Grant and I take weekends away without the children every 2 to 3 months throughout the year - he has booked us in for one between Christmas and New Year!  We also take off for a week or two in January and just relax at the beach.  Eat. Drink. Read. Play. Sleep.  Lots and lots of sleep.

This renews our bodies, our minds, our spirits and we come home full of energy and enthusiasm for the year ahead. More than that, of course, is the fact that I take January off entirely from work.  It's a wonderful way to start the year.  And clears my mind enough that I actually can see the path ahead of me clearly and more sharply in focus.

So, my question to you (as always:)

• How do you renew?
• Is it 'enough'?
• What benefit would be sufficient for you to take the task of renewal more seriously and actually write it in your calendar in pen?

 

The Value of Renewal and Quiet Space

We need quiet time to examine our lives openly and honestly... spending quiet time alone gives your mind an opportunity to renew itself and create order.

- Susan Taylor

I found this quote today, and thought it so appropriate given our theme this month of Renewal and Planning.  What do you think?

Does spending time alone sound like a wonderful pipe dream to you?  Or are you one of those 'outrageous extroverts' who loves to be around others - preferably plenty of others?

There is a time for socialising (and yes, I guess this time of year is MORE about socialising than perhaps any other time!) and there is a time for solitude.  And I think what is most crucial is that we balance the two.

Recently I talked about being someone who lives from the inside out, and how I need to make it easy for myself to live from the outside in... the way that some others do naturally.

But there is definitely a time and place to renew - and what better time than the start of a fresh, shiny new year.  To draw inward and reassess our lives, our livelihood, our relationships, our passions and motivations.

Creating Order

The quote above talks about not only giving your mind an opportunity to renew itself, but also to create order.

I believe that creating order out of chaos definitely starts in our mind.  I have often heard it said that mess, clutter and general disorder in our surroundings are a sign of a cluttered mind.  [Oh boy, what my office must sometimes say about me!!:]

And so it makes sense to start the ordering process, the renewal of body and spirit, by starting with our minds.  From there, we can create a picture of what it is we want to create, and the physical action will be so much easier.

Finding space and time

I can just hear you now.  Yeah, that's all good - but where am I going to find the time or the opportunity to spend quiet time alone, contemplating my navel...?

I realise it's a big ask.  And may seem impossible for you.  But consider this.  By creating a window of time in the next month or so, where you have even an hour to yourself of quiet time (and preferably longer), you will reap such benefits in your every day life that you will become much better at finding those quiet times from then on. 

The easiest way to find a time when you can be quietly alone is not in the spur of the moment (although that can work - if you notice an opportunity when suddenly the house is empty except for you - grasp it with both hands!  Don't use it to put on another load of washing).

To deliberately plan a time alone and declare your space to your nearest and dearest as non-negotiable YOU time - is often the only way you'll actually get time.

Do it now

Plan to spend some time alone and quiet, with no distractions in the next month or so (most likely after the hustle and bustle of the festive season is done).  Write on your calendar in INK!

Have you done it?

Soon, we'll look at the next step in this process.  What to do once you find yourself in that quiet space alone.  Please check back and join me.

Enjoying November

Since declaring in The Space in Sanctuary this month that I am determined to enjoy November, I've hardly thought about the declaration.  It's been busy - and about to get a lot busier.

We have schedule clashes like you wouldnt believe over the next few weeks, and G and I (and the kids) are having to chose what we attend, and what we don't.  Most of the clashes are week nights - which also brings up the factor of late nights and having to get up the next morning for work or school.

There is also the clash between duty and enjoyment.  Between a dinner for members of a Board that G is on (and their wives/husbands) and the David Jones shopping night for cardholders only (complete with bubbly, carols, free wrapping and many, many discounts).

We have made the DJs shopping night a tradition, G and I.  It is our night to go out, enjoy shopping in a quiet, pleasant atmosphere and tick off a large number of items from our shopping list in one swoop.  We look forward to it every year.  Only this year, it falls on the same night as the Board dinner, and that is also something we never miss.  The pull between duty and enjoyment is strong.

There are other things too.  Like the Speech Nights, and Valedictory dinners, work Christmas parties, farewells, and 40th birthday parties... We're working through each, one at a time, dealing with a) whether we want to go or not, b) whether we can fit it in to our schedule and c) whether it is the best thing to do with our time and energy at this time of year.

What I am noticing is that with the deliberate intention I set at the beginning of the month, decision making is much easier than it would otherwise have been.  I'm calm, and in being calm and focussing on enjoying November, [rather than arriving at December 1 kicking and screaming and a worn out frazzled mess...] I am finding that things are flowing very smoothly, and what is meant to happen is happening.

How's your November going?

Sunday Morning Brunch

We woke up this morning and decided to go out to brunch.  Just G and I.  A rarity with the busy lives we lead - but all the more necessary and precious because of it.

We chatted, caught up on things we'd been 'meaning to' discuss, but hadn't had the time, or the space, to do so.

You know how it is in a busy household, with three active kids (two teenagers!), both running our own businesses, plus the myriad other things that fill our lives.  At the moment, G is occupied (in his 'spare' time) paving around our new shed, building a block retaining wall and planning gardens etc - because currently it's all just dirt (or mud, when it rains).  And we really want to get it done before the heat of summer hits in its full intensity.

And so, a chance to sit and chat without any interruptions was bliss.   Sometimes it seems better to  go out to breakfast/brunch than dinner - especially since we're so busy and that means by the time we get to the end of the day we're too tired to think about what we want to discuss, let alone summon the energy to go out.

Take-away:  Do you make time to chat with your husband/partner where you can have those in-depth conversations that don't happen every day?  Do you know when your best time for these moments is?

Noticing Miracles

Over at Sanctuary for November, our theme is Noticing Miracles. 

I am enjoying November.  I awoke to the sound of rain this morning, which hasnt happened for so long, we're labelling it a miracle!  And, as I talk about in Sanctuary, things are blooming here in Brisbane - especially the trees.

This year, we bought two beautiful big pots to sit near our front door, and planted Magnolia Little Gems (the non-deciduous kind - the other kind wont grow here, it's too hot).  And we have been keeping the water up them (despite only being able to 'bucket' water, due to the restrictions) and watching eagerly for flowers. 

This week we were rewarded for our patience, with the first two flowers opening.  They are magnificent!  Bigger than my hand, with huge, luscious petals.

And I was so thankful for the ability to work from home, and therefore to be here to notice the blooms and really relish them, as they happen.  Each flower only lasts a couple of days, so it is important to enjoy them as they open.

Are you noticing the beauty around you?  Do you surround yourself with things that make you smile, that lift your heart, and make you stop, if even for a moment, and take a deep, satisfying breath?  What's stopping you?

An announcement, an apology and a request...

Apology first.  You may have noticed that Sanctuary has been a bit 'unreliable'? 'sporadic'? lately?  There are various, very good, reasons for that - but none of them are excuses.  And so I offer my apologies to you, my dear readers, not excuses. 

Sanctuary for October should be up by Saturday morning and the first thing you'll notice is that we have removed the password.  It was causing a few technical problems, and since we are in 'reinvention' mode here I thought we'd action that first.  (Yes, the new Sanctuary will be open to everyone, no registration required.  We'll still be looking for registrations, of course, so we can keep you up to date and so we can contact you when you win one of the special prizes, etc...)

If you havent caught up recently - check here for my first post about the reinvention of Sanctuary - it is undergoing a makeover and complete transformation!

My request to you is - would you please drop me an email, or give me a call, or leave a comment below and tell me -

"If there was one thing, just one, you'd like out of your on-line magazine - what would that be?"

Your answer to that question will help me greatly in making some critical decisions about the future look, feel, taste and content of Sanctuary (or whatever we decide to call it).  Go on - please!  Right this minute, what is the one thing you need to read about?

When the student is ready...

...the teacher will come. 

I am feeling like a student, going back to basics and having all the learning messages come my way without really seeking them.  (I'm thinking this is synchronicity, or the Universe listening...).  Let me explain...

It's only when I take a step back and look at the broader picture that I see how the threads of my learning, the 'teaching' I am receiving, are coming together in a new and very inspiring way.  And I am literally jumping out of my skin with excitement!

I knew it was time to 'reinvent' Sanctuary - my online site for women who do too much.  It's been going for 12 months now and needed a new injection of energy and that special 'something'.  Even when I was sick recently, and couldnt even bring my head around to check emails (let alone answer them) I was thinking about Sanctuary.

And then this month, over at Talking Story (as I've mentioned before), Rosa has hosted Joyful, Jubiliant Learning.  With 27 articles, all as different as their 27 authors, there was a lot of inspiration there - not only in terms of what they were writing about, however. 

One of the inspirations I got from it was that there are some terrific writers, who also happen to be busines people, out there - who are eager to share their knowledge with us all, and who really have something to say.

The second is that the type of information these people impart to us through their writing is so genuine, so very authentic - that even if their message is not relevant to us personally right now - the passion and belief and generosity they demonstrate is always relevant.

The third lesson is that everyone needs to hear something different, and that what one person finds irrelevant can be totally life-changing for another.

Then I read Steve Pavlina's post about his 30 day challenge to overcome news addiction.  I am quite news-averse - for all the reasons Steve lists in his post, and the news never gets turned on in this house.

Until now, I have sometimes had difficulty explaining our choice not to bring the news into our home.  But Steve has put it so eloquently. I have always found that if something happens in the world that we need to know about - someone will always tell us about it! 

So how do my feelings about listening to/reading the news (really, I am so glad Steve said it all, so that I dont have to 'get started'!), and my lessons from joyful, jubilant learning relate to Sanctuary?

SImply this - in the reinvention of Sanctuary (which will entail a name change as well), I am looking to develop an online magazine with real people as contributors - those who know and live what they are writing about, rather than journalists.

Yes, actually - I DO think sometimes that I have bitten off more than I can chew - and I do feel scared witless sometimes when I let myself - I guess this is me putting it out there with you as my witness!  I'm hitching my harness to the Power of We.

I am removing the password and the requirement to register to read Sanctuary in its new form.  It will be freely available online to all.

I am gathering together a team of brilliant contributors on a vast array of topics, all aimed at women who don't fit the 'mould'.  Who treasure their own individuality, and want more from a magazine than the latest lash-lengthening-mascara or who is doing what to whom. Women who want something very different to 'bad news'.

Watching a movie with my daughter recently (wish I could remember what it was called!) there was one line that stuck with me - 'floating on clouds of infinite possibility'.  That's the sort of feeling I want to engender when people read this magazine.  I want them to be able to sense, and even grasp, that wonderful sense of infinite possibility out there for them.  The world is their oyster!

I considered keeping this all a secret until launch, but decided that it would be a greater learning experience for me to write about it and share the development of this new 'media' with you all (warts and all...:) and hopefully there might be some learning to impart to my readers as well.  (Not to mention accountability for me).

I am working on the criteria for contributors, and will have advertising and sponsorship opportunities available.  We're looking at a tentative launch date of the monthly online publication of January 07.  (How's THAT for putting it out there??) 

If you're interested in exploring this opportunity with me - I would dearly love to hear from you.  Please email or call me!

Me Time Idea #30 - Do what you love

For the ultimate in 'me time'  you cannot go past doing what you love to do.  Even better if you do what you love to do as your career. 

You know what you love to spend time doing - so what is stopping you? 

Make one tiny little change today.  Each change will give you greater courage and motivation to make the next change, and the next.

Soon, you'll be jumping for joy!

Me Time Idea #29 - Leave your footprints in the sand...

Take a walk on the beach.  Sit and watch the surf pound onto the shore.  Feel the wind on your face and the sand between your toes.  Build sandcastles.  Comb the high tide line for shells and treasure. 

I always find time spent on the beach, whether it is surfing weather or not, restores my sense of self and helps me release all tension I have been holding in.